Friday, September 28, 2012
Sam's photo gallery! *LOOK THERE'S A PRIZE*
So I let Sam play with our digital camera so he won't accidentally buy apps on my phone. He's been experimenting with movement while taking pictures. So I thought it might be fun to have people guess what they are. Some are really obvious, some are really not. Depending on how many people submit guesses, I might give a prize to the person with the most correct answers. =) =) There's 16 total. Top is #1, bottom is #16
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Why I support CTU
Chicago. Man, I loved living there. The architecture, the lake, four real distinct seasons, the Cubs, evening summer concerts where you don't need a coat...I really loved being out there. But let me tell you about why we moved back. Teaching there SUCKED. And amidst all the ignorance being flouted about on the internet about the current teachers' strike, I'd like to offer you a narrative through which you might understand these events better.
When Tyson and I moved out there, we didn't have jobs. Around November, I landed a job teaching elementary music in a near South side district. Tyson was cashiering at the grocery store down the street from our apartment and hosting at a restaurant.
Enter Dr. John Gelsemino, a "head hunter" (recruiter) a retired band director, who was paid by principals of CPS to find people like us to work in their buildings. Over a lasagna dinner at a restaurant in Cicero (you can't make this stuff up), he "interviewed" us about our experience and bragged about how wonderful his band was when he was teaching. He got Tyson a job immediately in a West side school whose principal was a big deal in the Greek community (that guy got us a trumpet gig for Good Friday at an Orthodox church, a story I will save for a later post). Tyson's job for the remainder of that year was "building sub." Subs at that time were not required to have a teacher's certificate, and so you had all sorts of people "teaching" and the principals had come to the conclusion that it was safer for the kids to have a permanent class-coverage person than to call the sub center. (Prior to finding my elementary job, I had done a couple sub jobs that were horrific...also too long to post here) Tyson was supposed to work as a sub, then during his prep time, go get the band room ready for the following year. I was promised a job at a high school not far from our apartment.
Here, I need to interject a tidbit of how teacher pay worked in Illinois then (and I don't believe it has changed). Oregon used to have this system, where school funds are directly related to local property taxes. What happens is that high income areas end up with LOTS of money for their schools, fully funded athletics and arts, beautiful newer and updated buildings, and adequate to decent teacher pay and benefits. And smaller, working town or poverty riddled areas have terrible pay, no money for books, building maintenance, etc. This is how amazing schools like New Trier High School and terrible crumbling buildings can exist in the same state. You want to know why kids aren't educated equally? We can't even get the BUILDINGS to look equal. That first year, I made around $27K in that little district, and Tyson made around $32K, but neither of us was paid in the summer. The following school year we were both contracted music teachers for Chicago Public Schools. We were both making around $40K (no masters degrees at that point).
Sidenote: One troll on a news website said something about teachers getting 4 months off. I'd love to know where he got that number because the year Sam was born was the first year I had a summer off and it sure as hell was not 4 months....
Second year here is a rundown of the issues at MY job (listing both mine AND Tyson's experiences would be too much for one post). And keep in mind I worked at one of the schools that was considered "decent":
1) In August, when we started, my room was over 90 degrees plus humidity. No A/C, and no windows that opened. I did have an emergency exit door that led outside, and I put a fan in the open door just to circulate air. I was later reprimanded for that because "leaving the door open can let the rats in." I later found a dead mouse in one of my storage closets.
2) Every teacher was sharing a classroom. Because I was teaching music, I was lucky to only be in one room, but two other teachers used my room during my lunch and prep. Some teachers were assigned as many as three different places to teach. One guy taught math on the auditorium stage, and a special ed teacher had the atrium between the gym and main building.
3) We had an 11-period staggered start schedule. So seniors had period 1-8, with 4th period lunch, juniors 2-9, 5th period lunch, etc etc. Unless you were in sports. All athletes were assigned the 1-8 schedule so it wouldn't interfere with practice. 11th period ended at 5 pm. So if you were a teacher with the 4-11 schedule, the parking lot is full, and kids regularly skipped your last two classes.
4) Our principal told us flat out that "if more than 30% of your students are failing, you're doing something wrong" and corrective action would be taken (reprimand of the teacher in their file). Remember that 10th and 11th period truancy issue? If more than 30% of your kids were skipping class, the remaining 70% HAD to at least get a D, even if they slept through it, or never did any work. By the way, this is how students graduate high school not knowing how to read. It isn't the classroom teachers.
5) 2500 high schoolers in a building designed for 1200 middle schoolers. "Students" (gang bangers) enrolled only because they could deal drugs in the periods where everyone was in the building (4-8) and it was too crowded to monitor the hallways. Federal law requires schools to allow anyone under 21 to enroll, so we had to allow them to register and be in the building. When I think back to the chaos of those crowded hallways, I thank God there was never a fire. For those of you who think vouchers will solve all our bad school problems, the reason we had so many kids enrolled is because each kid came with x amount of dollars from the district, and we were a "safer" building than most. When only one school is acceptable, schools either get overcrowded like this, or all the "good" kids end up concentrated in one place. What do you think happens to everyone else?
6) I don't know if this was an Illinois, CPS, or federal rule, but any student with an IEP or 504 plan could not be expelled. If they brought a gun to school, the most you could do was a 2-week suspension. Dealing crack? 2-week suspension. And the district kept track of who did "the most suspensions" (thank you Arne Duncan).
7) Report cards were never mailed home (too many homeless and transient students), so we had "report card pickup night" something I'd never heard of out here in Oregon or Washington. Parents supposedly came to get the report card at an evening event that also doubled as conference time. Because the teachers were working in the evening, there would be no classes in the morning, and the conference time would count as contract time for that day. All probationary or first year teachers were "asked" to proctor the practice ACT that same morning, so if you were a first year teacher, you worked a 12 hour day with no break, and no pay for half of it. It was assumed that if you didn't fo it, your contract would not be renewed. (I filed a grievance for this particular incident and was denied because I accepted the "compensation" a $5 gift card to Borders in a thank you note)
8) If you took a field trip, you had to take a sick day, or bribe your colleagues to cover for you, with no pay.
9)The four people in the music department had one computer and one phone to share between us. The computer did not have internet access, and there was only one voicemail box to share. The phone was in my office, so I got the fun job of taking messages for everyone. To access email or enter grades, we had to use the student computer lab, and it would take several days because the server was so slow you couldn't get it done in one prep period.
10) I was only allowed to do 2 concerts a year, and no students were allowed to perform at graduation. They didn't want me to teach to the best of my abilities, they wanted someone to churn kids through the 1 year arts graduation requirement.
11) In our contract was a clause that "if a student attacks a teacher, the teacher may defend themself by any means necessary." How regular would the violence have to be for that kind of language to be included?
Now that I've told you all that, here's the context. That was in 2004-2005. The economy was still good. NCLB was in effect, but the "failing schools" and "reforms" hadn't really kicked in yet. For those of you who are teachers out West, think about how far our system has fallen in the last seven years. What I described occurred during the good years. Now put that in context with "merit pay" for student test scores.
This strike isn't all about teacher pay (and I keep wondering where the media gets the $76K figure...are administrators with teacher licenses included in that average? Because THEY make well over 100K a year)--although that is part of it, since they haven't had a cost of living increase in five years. And the main arguments I see against the teachers are these:
a) "Teachers make 75,000 a year and get three months off!" See above for my rebuttal to that. I have never made even close to that, not even after I had my masters degree (which I had to get over the summers....summers off? Please. Summers are when I caught up on all the stuff I didn't have time for during the year. Like inventory and curriculum planning). That salary average is being skewed somehow. And June 24th to August 15th is not three months. It's about 7 weeks. If you add that to spring and winter breaks you get just over two months. And we don't get paid for those.
b) "They're just whining about tests because the bad teachers don't want to be held accountable." See above for that, too. A student disappears for three months and comes back just before the test and my pay and job security is supposed to be based on THAT?
c) "fire them all, the selfish bastards, and replace them with subject matter experts or recent college grads." This is like hiring a journeyman carpenter to come in after a flood and not only fix the rotted wood and drywall, but also could you fix the plumbing while you're at it and buy the materials yourself? And if you don't, I'll get the freelance handyman down he street to do it, after all, he's not union so he'll cost less, and it doesn't really take any knowledge to do the job, hell, I could do it myself!! You only need to watch Renovation Realities or Holmes on Homes to know what a bad idea this is. Yet, we still have programs like Teach For America that basically say the art of teaching requires no skill or training. And we put those poor schmucks into the worst of the worst urban schools. It's "hiring the handyman for rehabbing post-Katrina homes." Sure, they might succeed, but it's going to be a lot more hit and miss than someone who chose to be a professional in that field, and will cost a lot more money because of the inevitable high turnover rate. Show me any job where turnover is high and also has a high success rate. I bet you won't find many, if any at all. Doing something well takes time and effort.
d) "If the union would quit protecting the bad teachers, I'd be more willing to support this." This one really gets me. I've worked in five districts, and I can only name two out of those hundreds of colleagues that I would label "bad" (and one of those was let go even though he'd been working for 6 years and was tenured). I've met a dozen lazy teachers and a handful of mediocre teachers all of whom still manage to do the job competently. When pressed about this subject, I've found that the person making a statement like this has a particular teacher in mind, or went to school in the 60s and 70s before all the training requirements were in place. Think. If you go to school in the United States, you had about 36 teachers from K-12. How many of those were really truly bad? I don't mean the ones you had a personality conflict with, or the effective-but-not-memorable ones, or even the ones who taught a subject you didn't like. I mean the ones who leave kids in the room while they watch soaps in their office. The fact is, those teachers are few and far between, and the union does NOT protect them from being fired. If they get away with it, it's because no one complained or said anything. There is a process, and it is harder than "go clean out your cubicle" but it can be done.
e) "Teachers shouldn't strike because the students need a place to learn. This proves they don't care about the kids." Translation: Teachers fighting for better physical conditions for your kid to learn in is not acceptable because you need the free day care, and since that's inconvenient for you, they should just roll over and take whatever abuse and pay cuts that legislators think is ok.
Oh, and just for the record, Tyson was way more demoralized working for Vancouver than Chicago, because of how poorly teachers were treated by administrators. Chew on that.
When Tyson and I moved out there, we didn't have jobs. Around November, I landed a job teaching elementary music in a near South side district. Tyson was cashiering at the grocery store down the street from our apartment and hosting at a restaurant.
Enter Dr. John Gelsemino, a "head hunter" (recruiter) a retired band director, who was paid by principals of CPS to find people like us to work in their buildings. Over a lasagna dinner at a restaurant in Cicero (you can't make this stuff up), he "interviewed" us about our experience and bragged about how wonderful his band was when he was teaching. He got Tyson a job immediately in a West side school whose principal was a big deal in the Greek community (that guy got us a trumpet gig for Good Friday at an Orthodox church, a story I will save for a later post). Tyson's job for the remainder of that year was "building sub." Subs at that time were not required to have a teacher's certificate, and so you had all sorts of people "teaching" and the principals had come to the conclusion that it was safer for the kids to have a permanent class-coverage person than to call the sub center. (Prior to finding my elementary job, I had done a couple sub jobs that were horrific...also too long to post here) Tyson was supposed to work as a sub, then during his prep time, go get the band room ready for the following year. I was promised a job at a high school not far from our apartment.
Here, I need to interject a tidbit of how teacher pay worked in Illinois then (and I don't believe it has changed). Oregon used to have this system, where school funds are directly related to local property taxes. What happens is that high income areas end up with LOTS of money for their schools, fully funded athletics and arts, beautiful newer and updated buildings, and adequate to decent teacher pay and benefits. And smaller, working town or poverty riddled areas have terrible pay, no money for books, building maintenance, etc. This is how amazing schools like New Trier High School and terrible crumbling buildings can exist in the same state. You want to know why kids aren't educated equally? We can't even get the BUILDINGS to look equal. That first year, I made around $27K in that little district, and Tyson made around $32K, but neither of us was paid in the summer. The following school year we were both contracted music teachers for Chicago Public Schools. We were both making around $40K (no masters degrees at that point).
Sidenote: One troll on a news website said something about teachers getting 4 months off. I'd love to know where he got that number because the year Sam was born was the first year I had a summer off and it sure as hell was not 4 months....
Second year here is a rundown of the issues at MY job (listing both mine AND Tyson's experiences would be too much for one post). And keep in mind I worked at one of the schools that was considered "decent":
1) In August, when we started, my room was over 90 degrees plus humidity. No A/C, and no windows that opened. I did have an emergency exit door that led outside, and I put a fan in the open door just to circulate air. I was later reprimanded for that because "leaving the door open can let the rats in." I later found a dead mouse in one of my storage closets.
2) Every teacher was sharing a classroom. Because I was teaching music, I was lucky to only be in one room, but two other teachers used my room during my lunch and prep. Some teachers were assigned as many as three different places to teach. One guy taught math on the auditorium stage, and a special ed teacher had the atrium between the gym and main building.
3) We had an 11-period staggered start schedule. So seniors had period 1-8, with 4th period lunch, juniors 2-9, 5th period lunch, etc etc. Unless you were in sports. All athletes were assigned the 1-8 schedule so it wouldn't interfere with practice. 11th period ended at 5 pm. So if you were a teacher with the 4-11 schedule, the parking lot is full, and kids regularly skipped your last two classes.
4) Our principal told us flat out that "if more than 30% of your students are failing, you're doing something wrong" and corrective action would be taken (reprimand of the teacher in their file). Remember that 10th and 11th period truancy issue? If more than 30% of your kids were skipping class, the remaining 70% HAD to at least get a D, even if they slept through it, or never did any work. By the way, this is how students graduate high school not knowing how to read. It isn't the classroom teachers.
5) 2500 high schoolers in a building designed for 1200 middle schoolers. "Students" (gang bangers) enrolled only because they could deal drugs in the periods where everyone was in the building (4-8) and it was too crowded to monitor the hallways. Federal law requires schools to allow anyone under 21 to enroll, so we had to allow them to register and be in the building. When I think back to the chaos of those crowded hallways, I thank God there was never a fire. For those of you who think vouchers will solve all our bad school problems, the reason we had so many kids enrolled is because each kid came with x amount of dollars from the district, and we were a "safer" building than most. When only one school is acceptable, schools either get overcrowded like this, or all the "good" kids end up concentrated in one place. What do you think happens to everyone else?
6) I don't know if this was an Illinois, CPS, or federal rule, but any student with an IEP or 504 plan could not be expelled. If they brought a gun to school, the most you could do was a 2-week suspension. Dealing crack? 2-week suspension. And the district kept track of who did "the most suspensions" (thank you Arne Duncan).
7) Report cards were never mailed home (too many homeless and transient students), so we had "report card pickup night" something I'd never heard of out here in Oregon or Washington. Parents supposedly came to get the report card at an evening event that also doubled as conference time. Because the teachers were working in the evening, there would be no classes in the morning, and the conference time would count as contract time for that day. All probationary or first year teachers were "asked" to proctor the practice ACT that same morning, so if you were a first year teacher, you worked a 12 hour day with no break, and no pay for half of it. It was assumed that if you didn't fo it, your contract would not be renewed. (I filed a grievance for this particular incident and was denied because I accepted the "compensation" a $5 gift card to Borders in a thank you note)
8) If you took a field trip, you had to take a sick day, or bribe your colleagues to cover for you, with no pay.
9)The four people in the music department had one computer and one phone to share between us. The computer did not have internet access, and there was only one voicemail box to share. The phone was in my office, so I got the fun job of taking messages for everyone. To access email or enter grades, we had to use the student computer lab, and it would take several days because the server was so slow you couldn't get it done in one prep period.
10) I was only allowed to do 2 concerts a year, and no students were allowed to perform at graduation. They didn't want me to teach to the best of my abilities, they wanted someone to churn kids through the 1 year arts graduation requirement.
11) In our contract was a clause that "if a student attacks a teacher, the teacher may defend themself by any means necessary." How regular would the violence have to be for that kind of language to be included?
Now that I've told you all that, here's the context. That was in 2004-2005. The economy was still good. NCLB was in effect, but the "failing schools" and "reforms" hadn't really kicked in yet. For those of you who are teachers out West, think about how far our system has fallen in the last seven years. What I described occurred during the good years. Now put that in context with "merit pay" for student test scores.
This strike isn't all about teacher pay (and I keep wondering where the media gets the $76K figure...are administrators with teacher licenses included in that average? Because THEY make well over 100K a year)--although that is part of it, since they haven't had a cost of living increase in five years. And the main arguments I see against the teachers are these:
a) "Teachers make 75,000 a year and get three months off!" See above for my rebuttal to that. I have never made even close to that, not even after I had my masters degree (which I had to get over the summers....summers off? Please. Summers are when I caught up on all the stuff I didn't have time for during the year. Like inventory and curriculum planning). That salary average is being skewed somehow. And June 24th to August 15th is not three months. It's about 7 weeks. If you add that to spring and winter breaks you get just over two months. And we don't get paid for those.
b) "They're just whining about tests because the bad teachers don't want to be held accountable." See above for that, too. A student disappears for three months and comes back just before the test and my pay and job security is supposed to be based on THAT?
c) "fire them all, the selfish bastards, and replace them with subject matter experts or recent college grads." This is like hiring a journeyman carpenter to come in after a flood and not only fix the rotted wood and drywall, but also could you fix the plumbing while you're at it and buy the materials yourself? And if you don't, I'll get the freelance handyman down he street to do it, after all, he's not union so he'll cost less, and it doesn't really take any knowledge to do the job, hell, I could do it myself!! You only need to watch Renovation Realities or Holmes on Homes to know what a bad idea this is. Yet, we still have programs like Teach For America that basically say the art of teaching requires no skill or training. And we put those poor schmucks into the worst of the worst urban schools. It's "hiring the handyman for rehabbing post-Katrina homes." Sure, they might succeed, but it's going to be a lot more hit and miss than someone who chose to be a professional in that field, and will cost a lot more money because of the inevitable high turnover rate. Show me any job where turnover is high and also has a high success rate. I bet you won't find many, if any at all. Doing something well takes time and effort.
d) "If the union would quit protecting the bad teachers, I'd be more willing to support this." This one really gets me. I've worked in five districts, and I can only name two out of those hundreds of colleagues that I would label "bad" (and one of those was let go even though he'd been working for 6 years and was tenured). I've met a dozen lazy teachers and a handful of mediocre teachers all of whom still manage to do the job competently. When pressed about this subject, I've found that the person making a statement like this has a particular teacher in mind, or went to school in the 60s and 70s before all the training requirements were in place. Think. If you go to school in the United States, you had about 36 teachers from K-12. How many of those were really truly bad? I don't mean the ones you had a personality conflict with, or the effective-but-not-memorable ones, or even the ones who taught a subject you didn't like. I mean the ones who leave kids in the room while they watch soaps in their office. The fact is, those teachers are few and far between, and the union does NOT protect them from being fired. If they get away with it, it's because no one complained or said anything. There is a process, and it is harder than "go clean out your cubicle" but it can be done.
e) "Teachers shouldn't strike because the students need a place to learn. This proves they don't care about the kids." Translation: Teachers fighting for better physical conditions for your kid to learn in is not acceptable because you need the free day care, and since that's inconvenient for you, they should just roll over and take whatever abuse and pay cuts that legislators think is ok.
Oh, and just for the record, Tyson was way more demoralized working for Vancouver than Chicago, because of how poorly teachers were treated by administrators. Chew on that.
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
First day of being a stay at home mom
I love fall. I love the smell of the air as the weather and the leaves start to change. It's still moderately warm and sunny, but crisp enough in the morning to enjoy a cup of coffee. And it's not gloomy gray yet. I love going to the pumpkin patch, fall harvest farmers market, Oktoberfest, football games, and it's full of great holidays and things to do. I also love setting up my classroom, organizing folders and music...I know it's totally nerdy of me, but there's something about the cardboard boxes, neat stacks of paper, and freshly waxed floors that gets me all revved up and motivated for a new school year (it probably has something to do with the fact that the classroom will never look that clean again for nine months...).
This past year, my assignment was itinerant elementary music. I liked that I actually had a group of kids for a whole year again (my previous assignment I taught a rotation of students, new group every six weeks), but I don't particularly enjoy teaching elementary music, and I REALLY don't like being itinerant. It's by far the hardest assignment I've had, and I've taught inner city high school choir. Crack dealers and kids on parole. This job sucked more than that, and here's why: You have no home base. That support system of being part of a team, secretaries that know your name, a principal who goes to bat for you? None of that exists. You're lucky if any of your colleagues know YOU exist. And it's hard on your car. At one of my buildings (I was at five), it was April before the secretary stopped asking for my ID because she didn't know who I was. At another building, the teacher never walked the kids to the door, she stood at the corner of the hallway and watched them come in. I don't think she knew my name. Yet another building, the same group of teachers kept asking me who I was subbing for that day. The only thing that made it tolerable was that I was part time, so I didn't work Wednesdays at all (a quirk of my schedule that I was assured would never happen again), and the full time music teachers at each building were incredibly supportive and helpful.
So this year, with no hope of getting a secondary assignment band OR choir, plus the expense of two kids in daycare and the prospect of having to pump and store breast milk in my car every day, Tyson and I did some math and figured that our net loss of income would only be around $200 a month if I stayed home (which honestly, we probably would have spent on maintenance and repairs to the cars with all the wear and tear of my commute). Then I got a call from Trinity and was offered one of the staff singer positions, which would make up the difference. The choice was really clear, I should stay at home. Better for the kids, easier on me, easier on our vehicles, less scheduling problems, don't have to schedule family time around school holidays....it's a no-brainer. I now have time to do stuff like harvest the grapes in our yard and learn how to make wine, make stuff like Halloween costumes, do fun activities with Sam like gymnastics and swimming lessons, and finally research and write an article that has been roiling around in my head for two years....the possibilities are endless.
But in the back of my head I keep wondering if I have just sacrificed my career. Not that it was going anywhere in Evergreen anyway. I can tell that I have no hope of getting a secondary assignment in this district. I wonder if any principal or other administrator will respect the choice that I've made, or will I have to start from scratch to get the job I want? I have very little interest in a career teaching elementary music. Philosophically, I understand the importance of elementary music, and the importance of doing it well. And I have a great deal of respect for those among us who thrive on making that happen. I was lucky to work with some really great teachers this year, and that helped me get excited about what I was doing, but I know myself well enough to know I wouldn't be able to sustain my motivation for more than another year or two. And changing jobs isn't really an option because our long term plan includes leaving Portland within the next three to five years. So if we don't need the money, I get to be a stay at home mom for a few years, and just get a new job in whatever city we end up in next. By that time, Noelle will be old enough for preschool, and Sam will be in kindergarten or 1st grade, so I can go back to work full time.
While I know that being a stay at home mom is by no means slacking (my mom stayed at home, and she worked constantly--I also know several very hard working full time moms who are my age), I've been on in a school routine for almost thirty years now. So it feels like I'm slacking because I get to make my own schedule instead of following someone else's. And while I contemplate that, I think it might be time to change a poopy diaper. And read my son a book. And think about what meals I will be making tomorrow. And fold laundry. And go to the park. And work on Halloween costumes. And make art projects. And squish grapes for wine.
This past year, my assignment was itinerant elementary music. I liked that I actually had a group of kids for a whole year again (my previous assignment I taught a rotation of students, new group every six weeks), but I don't particularly enjoy teaching elementary music, and I REALLY don't like being itinerant. It's by far the hardest assignment I've had, and I've taught inner city high school choir. Crack dealers and kids on parole. This job sucked more than that, and here's why: You have no home base. That support system of being part of a team, secretaries that know your name, a principal who goes to bat for you? None of that exists. You're lucky if any of your colleagues know YOU exist. And it's hard on your car. At one of my buildings (I was at five), it was April before the secretary stopped asking for my ID because she didn't know who I was. At another building, the teacher never walked the kids to the door, she stood at the corner of the hallway and watched them come in. I don't think she knew my name. Yet another building, the same group of teachers kept asking me who I was subbing for that day. The only thing that made it tolerable was that I was part time, so I didn't work Wednesdays at all (a quirk of my schedule that I was assured would never happen again), and the full time music teachers at each building were incredibly supportive and helpful.
So this year, with no hope of getting a secondary assignment band OR choir, plus the expense of two kids in daycare and the prospect of having to pump and store breast milk in my car every day, Tyson and I did some math and figured that our net loss of income would only be around $200 a month if I stayed home (which honestly, we probably would have spent on maintenance and repairs to the cars with all the wear and tear of my commute). Then I got a call from Trinity and was offered one of the staff singer positions, which would make up the difference. The choice was really clear, I should stay at home. Better for the kids, easier on me, easier on our vehicles, less scheduling problems, don't have to schedule family time around school holidays....it's a no-brainer. I now have time to do stuff like harvest the grapes in our yard and learn how to make wine, make stuff like Halloween costumes, do fun activities with Sam like gymnastics and swimming lessons, and finally research and write an article that has been roiling around in my head for two years....the possibilities are endless.
But in the back of my head I keep wondering if I have just sacrificed my career. Not that it was going anywhere in Evergreen anyway. I can tell that I have no hope of getting a secondary assignment in this district. I wonder if any principal or other administrator will respect the choice that I've made, or will I have to start from scratch to get the job I want? I have very little interest in a career teaching elementary music. Philosophically, I understand the importance of elementary music, and the importance of doing it well. And I have a great deal of respect for those among us who thrive on making that happen. I was lucky to work with some really great teachers this year, and that helped me get excited about what I was doing, but I know myself well enough to know I wouldn't be able to sustain my motivation for more than another year or two. And changing jobs isn't really an option because our long term plan includes leaving Portland within the next three to five years. So if we don't need the money, I get to be a stay at home mom for a few years, and just get a new job in whatever city we end up in next. By that time, Noelle will be old enough for preschool, and Sam will be in kindergarten or 1st grade, so I can go back to work full time.
While I know that being a stay at home mom is by no means slacking (my mom stayed at home, and she worked constantly--I also know several very hard working full time moms who are my age), I've been on in a school routine for almost thirty years now. So it feels like I'm slacking because I get to make my own schedule instead of following someone else's. And while I contemplate that, I think it might be time to change a poopy diaper. And read my son a book. And think about what meals I will be making tomorrow. And fold laundry. And go to the park. And work on Halloween costumes. And make art projects. And squish grapes for wine.
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Truths about caring for a newborn that I forgot.
One of the greatest things about the human brain is how it blocks the details of things that are unpleasant or traumatizing. In horrific circumstances (disasters, abuse, attacks) it's the brain's way of protecting itself so that we are allowed to function beyond that event and go on with our lives. In other unpleasant or painful situations (childbirth, caring for a newborn) it's nature's way of guaranteeing we don't stop after one. Of course this is a gross generalization and there are exceptions, but this happened to me and I had forgotten some details of caring for a newborn (no doubt sleep-deprived-amnesia).......so to ensure I don't forget again.....
1. The smaller you are, the cuter everything is that you do, no matter how gross. No one walks up to a random adult stranger in the bathroom and comment on how cute their poop is. But an infant? "AWWWW Look at the little stinky pants. Did you make a wittle stinky?"
2. You're not going to sleep. Forget about it, quit trying to force it, DEAL.
3. The most vocal parenting experts are those without children of their own.
4. I really REALLY hate formula company marketing tactics. I don't care how you feed your kid. Really. If your kid does best on vitamin-fortified goats milk, go for it (although in that case I'm sure the doctor would try and talk you out of it....) But when someone *wants* to breastfeed and a company actively sabotages that to make money...that pisses me off. It also makes me mad that those tactics ("free" samples, etc) are paid for by those of you who use formula. It's built into the price. You are paying more than you should so that some billionaire can advertise formula and undermine breastfeeding, against the law, in developing countries where clean water is a huge issue. So if you're using it not by choice but because you had to? I'm mad FOR you.
5. A newborn is like a drunk person. You can't understand them because all they do is cry, they can't hold their head up, you have to carry them everywhere, they definitely shouldn't drive, and they're always reaching for boobs or bottles.
6. A baby monitor is not necessary in a house that is only 1000 square feet.
7. A man in a park with a baby? Hot chick magnet. A woman in a park with a baby? Grandma magnet. And other moms. (Not that I'm looking, Tyson.....I'm jus' sayin'....) Any single guys wanna babysit for me?
8. There is not much that is funnier than hearing a baby poop when someone else is holding them, and watching that person's face. Possession is 9/10ths right?
1. The smaller you are, the cuter everything is that you do, no matter how gross. No one walks up to a random adult stranger in the bathroom and comment on how cute their poop is. But an infant? "AWWWW Look at the little stinky pants. Did you make a wittle stinky?"
2. You're not going to sleep. Forget about it, quit trying to force it, DEAL.3. The most vocal parenting experts are those without children of their own.
4. I really REALLY hate formula company marketing tactics. I don't care how you feed your kid. Really. If your kid does best on vitamin-fortified goats milk, go for it (although in that case I'm sure the doctor would try and talk you out of it....) But when someone *wants* to breastfeed and a company actively sabotages that to make money...that pisses me off. It also makes me mad that those tactics ("free" samples, etc) are paid for by those of you who use formula. It's built into the price. You are paying more than you should so that some billionaire can advertise formula and undermine breastfeeding, against the law, in developing countries where clean water is a huge issue. So if you're using it not by choice but because you had to? I'm mad FOR you.
5. A newborn is like a drunk person. You can't understand them because all they do is cry, they can't hold their head up, you have to carry them everywhere, they definitely shouldn't drive, and they're always reaching for boobs or bottles.
6. A baby monitor is not necessary in a house that is only 1000 square feet.
7. A man in a park with a baby? Hot chick magnet. A woman in a park with a baby? Grandma magnet. And other moms. (Not that I'm looking, Tyson.....I'm jus' sayin'....) Any single guys wanna babysit for me?
8. There is not much that is funnier than hearing a baby poop when someone else is holding them, and watching that person's face. Possession is 9/10ths right?
Friday, June 15, 2012
A year off to think (part the second)
So in the summer of 2003, I packed up my teaching stuff for the first time and left for a 2 1/2 week solo trip to Europe (that's a whole post of its own). When I returned, we had about two weeks to pack up our two separate apartments and haul it across the country. We were in a bit of a hurry because we still had not heard if our teaching licenses had transferred so we had no jobs.
A very long story short, we were both unemployed until November when I found a full time job teaching elementary general music grade 3-5. I spent most of that year surviving on lesson plans and games I acquired during student teaching (thank God for Eileen Treusch....), and learning about the still very much segregated city of Chicago. In December, Tyson was found by a "headhunter" (recruiter) for Chicago Public Schools. The recruiter (a balding Italian man who interviewed us at a restaurant in Cicero over a plate of lasagna....you can't make this stuff up....) guaranteed Tyson a job as a regular band teacher after he worked that year as a building sub, a position we had never heard of---basically, so many teachers call in sick every day, that the individual buildings actually have to employ full time subs to cover classes. He recommended me for a full time choir job at a high school, which I started that following September. My third job in as many years. I had four beginning choirs of anywhere from 35-45 students, and one class of mostly seniors for Music history/appreciation of about 40, where I was able to develop a decent high-school curriculum and keep my philosophy intact.
What we learned in those two years out in Chicago was this:
1) A majority of primary schools in CPS are K-8, and whether they have music is hit and miss. There are no ensembles for grades 6-8, generally. This only applies to neighborhood schools, though, not the magnet or charter schools.
2) Because of the inconsistency of music instruction at the primary level, students do not start ensembles until high school. Beginning band with 9th grade gang bangers. Wrap your head around that....
3) Principals have absolute power, private industry style, over their teaching staff. On the surface, this sounds like a libertarian dream come true. But what actually happens is this: If you don't do as you are told, you will find yourself "laid off" regardless of years of experience, effectiveness with the students, accomplishments or progress made. You get "volunteered" for extra duty and not paid for it. You get suspended without pay for an accusation---even when there are multiple witnesses that contradict the accusation. You can have all of your fundraising money wiped out because the principal needed it for some other activity.
4) If the superintendent (Chief Educational Officer, or CEO) doesn't even know all the principals by name, you as a teacher are a nameless statistic and number, as are the kids. Everything and everyone depends, lives and dies by the paperwork. Phone logs, lesson plans, discipline, memos, reminders paper paper paper paper paper paper everything (because if you're lucky you have ONE computer per subject department, and if you're REALLY lucky it's hooked up to the internet. Our music department had one phone to share between the four of us, and it was in my office. Tyson's entire floor had no phone, they had to go downstairs to the math office). You are a cog in a machine. Period.
5) To survive in this environment (forget actually being effective), you have to avoid the teachers who have burned out and have nowhere else to go. You have to mentally shut the kids out at the end of the duty day, because there is so much need you could never hope to come close to meeting it. Or you have to pick and choose which kids to help, like triage in an emergency room. Pick and choose based on who you think might make it.
In the end, we decided that if we continued to teach in CPS, we would both quit teaching within a few years, so we both started applying for jobs in the suburbs, around Seattle, and around Portland. By August (the end of Tyson's second summer at Northwestern, and the end of my first) I had secured a job at a brand new middle school in Longview, WA, and we packed up our things into a moving truck and came home to the Pacific Northwest.
A very long story short, we were both unemployed until November when I found a full time job teaching elementary general music grade 3-5. I spent most of that year surviving on lesson plans and games I acquired during student teaching (thank God for Eileen Treusch....), and learning about the still very much segregated city of Chicago. In December, Tyson was found by a "headhunter" (recruiter) for Chicago Public Schools. The recruiter (a balding Italian man who interviewed us at a restaurant in Cicero over a plate of lasagna....you can't make this stuff up....) guaranteed Tyson a job as a regular band teacher after he worked that year as a building sub, a position we had never heard of---basically, so many teachers call in sick every day, that the individual buildings actually have to employ full time subs to cover classes. He recommended me for a full time choir job at a high school, which I started that following September. My third job in as many years. I had four beginning choirs of anywhere from 35-45 students, and one class of mostly seniors for Music history/appreciation of about 40, where I was able to develop a decent high-school curriculum and keep my philosophy intact.
What we learned in those two years out in Chicago was this:
1) A majority of primary schools in CPS are K-8, and whether they have music is hit and miss. There are no ensembles for grades 6-8, generally. This only applies to neighborhood schools, though, not the magnet or charter schools.
2) Because of the inconsistency of music instruction at the primary level, students do not start ensembles until high school. Beginning band with 9th grade gang bangers. Wrap your head around that....
3) Principals have absolute power, private industry style, over their teaching staff. On the surface, this sounds like a libertarian dream come true. But what actually happens is this: If you don't do as you are told, you will find yourself "laid off" regardless of years of experience, effectiveness with the students, accomplishments or progress made. You get "volunteered" for extra duty and not paid for it. You get suspended without pay for an accusation---even when there are multiple witnesses that contradict the accusation. You can have all of your fundraising money wiped out because the principal needed it for some other activity.
4) If the superintendent (Chief Educational Officer, or CEO) doesn't even know all the principals by name, you as a teacher are a nameless statistic and number, as are the kids. Everything and everyone depends, lives and dies by the paperwork. Phone logs, lesson plans, discipline, memos, reminders paper paper paper paper paper paper everything (because if you're lucky you have ONE computer per subject department, and if you're REALLY lucky it's hooked up to the internet. Our music department had one phone to share between the four of us, and it was in my office. Tyson's entire floor had no phone, they had to go downstairs to the math office). You are a cog in a machine. Period.
5) To survive in this environment (forget actually being effective), you have to avoid the teachers who have burned out and have nowhere else to go. You have to mentally shut the kids out at the end of the duty day, because there is so much need you could never hope to come close to meeting it. Or you have to pick and choose which kids to help, like triage in an emergency room. Pick and choose based on who you think might make it.
In the end, we decided that if we continued to teach in CPS, we would both quit teaching within a few years, so we both started applying for jobs in the suburbs, around Seattle, and around Portland. By August (the end of Tyson's second summer at Northwestern, and the end of my first) I had secured a job at a brand new middle school in Longview, WA, and we packed up our things into a moving truck and came home to the Pacific Northwest.
Thursday, June 14, 2012
A year off to think. (part 1)
So Tyson has been concerned about my career. More specifically, he's worried about me following his career around. So I started reflecting on what I have done in the past ten years, including student teaching...what do I like best, what do I think I do best and and would like to pursue....and so far the conclusion that I've come to is that I'm glad I have this next year off to think about it.
My student teaching started with a part-time internship at Whitman Middle School with a fantastic orchestra teacher named Megan Cleary. She was, at the time, teaching 6th grade choir, 6th and 7/8 orchestra, then traveling to Ingraham High School for orchestra and mariachi (an after school group). That spring with her students, I attempted to play cello with the kids, learned how to tune violins REALLY FAST, and got my first exposure to non-traditional curriculum. During that experience, she said to me "you should do your student teaching with Rich Sumstad over at Nathan Hale. He does band and choir, and you would probably get along really well." So the following September, I talked to the guy in the school of education who did all the music teacher placements. What I found out much much later was this: Rich had worked with a string of student teachers, one every year for the past few years, and he had promised his students he wouldn't have any more for a while. But my placement person was Rich's high school band director. So he interviewed me anyway, and let the kids vote on it. Thankfully, the previous year, they'd had a good experience with the student teacher (who I am now married to...) so between that and Rich's recommendation, the students voted to give me a chance. (side note: Thanks Tyson, for NOT sucking! Love you!)
Rich had turned a rough high school program (15 kids in band, 15 kids in choir, three piano classes) into one of the most respected schools in the city. When I was there, he had an award winning vocal jazz group, a concert choir (60 kids) and band (75 kids), two jazz bands, an orchestra (taught by Megan) and an all-auditioned, brand new women's choir of 15, which I directed that spring as a contracted employee of the parent's group. But what he really emphasized with me (and with Tyson, too, I found out later) was the piano lab. "We say music is important for all students, but never offer anything besides ensembles. This is the class that I protect as much as my most select ensemble, because this is the class where we reach the rest of the student body."
If that philosophy familiar to you Northwestern folks, here's the reason why: Rich's mentor was Steve Morrison at the University of Washington. Dr. Morrison was one of Bennett Reimer's students. =)
This student teaching experience shaped my philosophy going into my first job, and was reinforced every place I went after. And then, of course, it was cemented when I went to Northwestern, and has become my philosophical "hill to die on" in the current educational environment (more on that later).
First job was Ingraham High School. Twenty-two years old, teaching high schoolers. I would have visitors to the classroom, and watch their confused faces as they tried to figure out which person in the room was the teacher. I was stopped for my hall pass a couple times, and had my lunch taken away from me by the cafeteria worker because I cut in line (Thank God I remembered to put on my ID badge that day). But the "kids" were great for the most part, and the parents were incredibly supportive. I also had a lot of supportive colleagues in the building, and Tyson, who Saved. My. Ass. with regards to marching band. ("Band camp?" I said. Tyson says "Yeah, and do you have drill paper?" Me: "What's that?" *facepalm*----marching band is the ONE place SPU really dropped the ball for us music ed people. One professor in ONE class said "if you want to know about marching band, come see me and I'll give you a show that will make your principal happy." That was the extent of our instruction....)
But despite the high learning curve, and being very close in age to the students, I felt I made a LOT of progress in one year, and was already plotting how to take over the top spot in the district for choir. Then I got my RIF notice. After crying (a lot), and students writing angry letters to the administration and district, Tyson says to me "I want to go to Northwestern, take some trumpet lessons from someone in the CSO, but I don't want to go without you." So I spent that last month or two researching apartments, jobs, how to transfer teaching licenses, etc, and renting a truck for us to move the two of us 2000 miles away from everything and everyone we knew.
*if you have read this far, congratulations! I have to take a break, so stay tuned for the rest of the story, and my conclusions about what to do with the rest of my career.....
My student teaching started with a part-time internship at Whitman Middle School with a fantastic orchestra teacher named Megan Cleary. She was, at the time, teaching 6th grade choir, 6th and 7/8 orchestra, then traveling to Ingraham High School for orchestra and mariachi (an after school group). That spring with her students, I attempted to play cello with the kids, learned how to tune violins REALLY FAST, and got my first exposure to non-traditional curriculum. During that experience, she said to me "you should do your student teaching with Rich Sumstad over at Nathan Hale. He does band and choir, and you would probably get along really well." So the following September, I talked to the guy in the school of education who did all the music teacher placements. What I found out much much later was this: Rich had worked with a string of student teachers, one every year for the past few years, and he had promised his students he wouldn't have any more for a while. But my placement person was Rich's high school band director. So he interviewed me anyway, and let the kids vote on it. Thankfully, the previous year, they'd had a good experience with the student teacher (who I am now married to...) so between that and Rich's recommendation, the students voted to give me a chance. (side note: Thanks Tyson, for NOT sucking! Love you!)
Rich had turned a rough high school program (15 kids in band, 15 kids in choir, three piano classes) into one of the most respected schools in the city. When I was there, he had an award winning vocal jazz group, a concert choir (60 kids) and band (75 kids), two jazz bands, an orchestra (taught by Megan) and an all-auditioned, brand new women's choir of 15, which I directed that spring as a contracted employee of the parent's group. But what he really emphasized with me (and with Tyson, too, I found out later) was the piano lab. "We say music is important for all students, but never offer anything besides ensembles. This is the class that I protect as much as my most select ensemble, because this is the class where we reach the rest of the student body."
If that philosophy familiar to you Northwestern folks, here's the reason why: Rich's mentor was Steve Morrison at the University of Washington. Dr. Morrison was one of Bennett Reimer's students. =)
This student teaching experience shaped my philosophy going into my first job, and was reinforced every place I went after. And then, of course, it was cemented when I went to Northwestern, and has become my philosophical "hill to die on" in the current educational environment (more on that later).
First job was Ingraham High School. Twenty-two years old, teaching high schoolers. I would have visitors to the classroom, and watch their confused faces as they tried to figure out which person in the room was the teacher. I was stopped for my hall pass a couple times, and had my lunch taken away from me by the cafeteria worker because I cut in line (Thank God I remembered to put on my ID badge that day). But the "kids" were great for the most part, and the parents were incredibly supportive. I also had a lot of supportive colleagues in the building, and Tyson, who Saved. My. Ass. with regards to marching band. ("Band camp?" I said. Tyson says "Yeah, and do you have drill paper?" Me: "What's that?" *facepalm*----marching band is the ONE place SPU really dropped the ball for us music ed people. One professor in ONE class said "if you want to know about marching band, come see me and I'll give you a show that will make your principal happy." That was the extent of our instruction....)
But despite the high learning curve, and being very close in age to the students, I felt I made a LOT of progress in one year, and was already plotting how to take over the top spot in the district for choir. Then I got my RIF notice. After crying (a lot), and students writing angry letters to the administration and district, Tyson says to me "I want to go to Northwestern, take some trumpet lessons from someone in the CSO, but I don't want to go without you." So I spent that last month or two researching apartments, jobs, how to transfer teaching licenses, etc, and renting a truck for us to move the two of us 2000 miles away from everything and everyone we knew.
*if you have read this far, congratulations! I have to take a break, so stay tuned for the rest of the story, and my conclusions about what to do with the rest of my career.....
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Tribute to my sandals
While I was in college, I had very little extra money for anything. At one point, I was working maybe 2 or 3 part time jobs, piecemealing about $500 a month to live on--$200 of which was my portion of rent (thank God for student loans, full time summer jobs and my parents or tuition would have never gotten paid). A very good friend gave me first dibs on dress clothes that she was replacing, I had a paid-for, reliable pickup truck, and some dishes that a roommate left behind when she moved out for whoever wanted them (which I still have. It was a nice set!)
What I splurged on was shoes. I bought my first set of really nice running shoes with some gig money I earned singing at a church. First hiking boots came from an Easter trumpet gig. The year I did my student teaching, I met Tyson, who had student taught with the same guy the year before me. After we had been dating a few months, I graduated and he bought me my first pair of Tevas as a graduation present (then, as now, he has a talent for knowing what the perfect gift is for me on special occasions). I had really wanted a pair of those sandals, but being as short on money as I was, I couldn't justify spending $40 or $50 on SANDALS. The money I received as graduation presents from relatives bought me a two day trip to San Jose/San Francisco (and yes I realize I could have bought my own Tevas with that money, too, but my boyfriend had already done it for me!!). So my adventures with these shoes started with a trip to California. My first solo traveling experience.
Now I should say that I'm writing this because today, TEN YEARS LATER, I have finally replaced these sandals. And they're not falling apart. I'm replacing them because the velcro is finally coming unstitched a little bit, and the rubber is worn down at the toes so they're not as comfortable as they used to be.
But.
I'm having trouble throwing them out because we've been through so much together. I know it's stupid to get sentimental about a pair of shoes. These sandals have been with me:
1) To San Francisco, twice.
2) To England and Spain, twice.
3) to Scotland once---and were the shoes I wore the first time I drove in the UK (eek!)
4) Getting in and out of the moving truck back and forth across 4000 miles of driving.
5) Every summer we were in Chicago. Outdoor concerts, running to catch a train, Cubs games, hiking to class across the NU campus, exploring forest preserves, Indiana Dunes and Starved Rock state parks and countless trips to the shore of Lake Michigan.
6) A night out in Reno because all my other shoes were packed in the moving truck.
7) On my last two plane trips---Las Vegas and Phoenix---because they're easy to take off like flip-flops but are sturdy enough to run from gate to gate if the TSA makes you late for boarding.
8) Every backpacking trip, up a ridge between Mt. St. Helens and Mt. Ranier, crossing rivers and rock scrambling.
9) Two trips to Shasta Lake and Bend.
I guess I'm not really sentimental about the sandals themselves but all the adventures they represent.
But seriously, TEN YEARS? What pair of shoes lasts that long with that much abuse? So even though the replacement pair was exactly twice as much as what Tyson paid for the first pair, I figure if these new ones bring me half the adventure the first pair did, they'll be worth every penny.
What I splurged on was shoes. I bought my first set of really nice running shoes with some gig money I earned singing at a church. First hiking boots came from an Easter trumpet gig. The year I did my student teaching, I met Tyson, who had student taught with the same guy the year before me. After we had been dating a few months, I graduated and he bought me my first pair of Tevas as a graduation present (then, as now, he has a talent for knowing what the perfect gift is for me on special occasions). I had really wanted a pair of those sandals, but being as short on money as I was, I couldn't justify spending $40 or $50 on SANDALS. The money I received as graduation presents from relatives bought me a two day trip to San Jose/San Francisco (and yes I realize I could have bought my own Tevas with that money, too, but my boyfriend had already done it for me!!). So my adventures with these shoes started with a trip to California. My first solo traveling experience.
Now I should say that I'm writing this because today, TEN YEARS LATER, I have finally replaced these sandals. And they're not falling apart. I'm replacing them because the velcro is finally coming unstitched a little bit, and the rubber is worn down at the toes so they're not as comfortable as they used to be.But.
I'm having trouble throwing them out because we've been through so much together. I know it's stupid to get sentimental about a pair of shoes. These sandals have been with me:
1) To San Francisco, twice.
2) To England and Spain, twice.
3) to Scotland once---and were the shoes I wore the first time I drove in the UK (eek!)
4) Getting in and out of the moving truck back and forth across 4000 miles of driving.
5) Every summer we were in Chicago. Outdoor concerts, running to catch a train, Cubs games, hiking to class across the NU campus, exploring forest preserves, Indiana Dunes and Starved Rock state parks and countless trips to the shore of Lake Michigan.6) A night out in Reno because all my other shoes were packed in the moving truck.
7) On my last two plane trips---Las Vegas and Phoenix---because they're easy to take off like flip-flops but are sturdy enough to run from gate to gate if the TSA makes you late for boarding.
8) Every backpacking trip, up a ridge between Mt. St. Helens and Mt. Ranier, crossing rivers and rock scrambling.
9) Two trips to Shasta Lake and Bend.
I guess I'm not really sentimental about the sandals themselves but all the adventures they represent.
But seriously, TEN YEARS? What pair of shoes lasts that long with that much abuse? So even though the replacement pair was exactly twice as much as what Tyson paid for the first pair, I figure if these new ones bring me half the adventure the first pair did, they'll be worth every penny.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
So there I was, innocently watching Jon Stewart...
I really enjoy "The Daily Show" and "Colbert Report" but sometimes I don't watch the interviews. Especially if it's a ditzy actress who is only on there to plug a generic soon-to-be-forgotten movie. Generally, I like watching the interviews if it's someone interesting (I love it especially when the Daily Show has Bill O'Reilly on....)
So tonight, I'm watching the interview because it happens to be Madeleine Albright, and the last time I remember her being on was during the 2008 presidential primary and in the interview endorsed Hillary Clinton and blasted NCLB for its part in narrowing educational curriculum (although I've seen it more in music, PE, and arts, and she was specifically referring to civics and social studies being de-emphasized, it was gratifying to know that I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE SEEING THIS TREND!) Anyhoo...
She's on the show promoting her new book called "Prague Winter" specifically outlining Czechoslovakia from the Nazi invasion until a few years after the end of the war, 1937-1948. And while I knew she was an immigrant turned naturalized citizen (thank you Alexandra Pelosi for that amazing documentary you made), I didn't know that she was from Czechoslovakia.
I'm an American mutt. No doubt about it, with a Scottish/English name (the village of Fife has quite a few Beveridges....it's not as unusual as you think!) most of my family has been in the U.S. long enough that I can't quite claim any particular "ethnicity"---except one.
My great-grandmother was born in Czechoslovakia which makes me an eighth Czech---the largest percentage of my "mutt." Or so I had been told my whole life. What I learned tonight, and I'm not sure how I didn't find this out before, is that Czechoslovakia did not exist as a country until 1918, at the end of WWI. Prior to that, it was a collection of small ethnic regions that were under the control of the Austro-Hungarian empire. There were three primary regions in the area that became the country of Czechoslovakia: Bohemia, Moravia-Silisia, and Slovakia. There was also a small region that was part of the country but annexed by the Soviet Union after WWII and now is part of Ukraine.
Here's the part that has blown my mind tonight: My great-grandmother was born in 1903. Her father immigrated here, established work and a home, then went back for the family. She came here when she was 11, which would make the year 1914, or the start of WWI. Czechoslovakia wasn't even a country yet. So now, without knowing which village they actually came from, I don't know which ethnic group they belonged to. Where was she really from? Which language did they speak? Hungarian? German? Czech? Slovak? Could I say that I am actually an eighth ethnically Bohemian (because how cool would THAT be as a musician, hahahaha)?
And really, does it matter? It doesn't change the fact that they decided to come here---for what reason now, I don't know (my neighbor's family left Germany when the Nazis took over---did my great-great grandfather see the warning signs of WWI? Or was it just about work/opportunity like so many others in that era?). But writing this all down means I might be able to sleep tonight instead of letting my mind stew about it and keep me awake.
So tonight, I'm watching the interview because it happens to be Madeleine Albright, and the last time I remember her being on was during the 2008 presidential primary and in the interview endorsed Hillary Clinton and blasted NCLB for its part in narrowing educational curriculum (although I've seen it more in music, PE, and arts, and she was specifically referring to civics and social studies being de-emphasized, it was gratifying to know that I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE SEEING THIS TREND!) Anyhoo...
She's on the show promoting her new book called "Prague Winter" specifically outlining Czechoslovakia from the Nazi invasion until a few years after the end of the war, 1937-1948. And while I knew she was an immigrant turned naturalized citizen (thank you Alexandra Pelosi for that amazing documentary you made), I didn't know that she was from Czechoslovakia.
I'm an American mutt. No doubt about it, with a Scottish/English name (the village of Fife has quite a few Beveridges....it's not as unusual as you think!) most of my family has been in the U.S. long enough that I can't quite claim any particular "ethnicity"---except one.
My great-grandmother was born in Czechoslovakia which makes me an eighth Czech---the largest percentage of my "mutt." Or so I had been told my whole life. What I learned tonight, and I'm not sure how I didn't find this out before, is that Czechoslovakia did not exist as a country until 1918, at the end of WWI. Prior to that, it was a collection of small ethnic regions that were under the control of the Austro-Hungarian empire. There were three primary regions in the area that became the country of Czechoslovakia: Bohemia, Moravia-Silisia, and Slovakia. There was also a small region that was part of the country but annexed by the Soviet Union after WWII and now is part of Ukraine.
Here's the part that has blown my mind tonight: My great-grandmother was born in 1903. Her father immigrated here, established work and a home, then went back for the family. She came here when she was 11, which would make the year 1914, or the start of WWI. Czechoslovakia wasn't even a country yet. So now, without knowing which village they actually came from, I don't know which ethnic group they belonged to. Where was she really from? Which language did they speak? Hungarian? German? Czech? Slovak? Could I say that I am actually an eighth ethnically Bohemian (because how cool would THAT be as a musician, hahahaha)?
And really, does it matter? It doesn't change the fact that they decided to come here---for what reason now, I don't know (my neighbor's family left Germany when the Nazis took over---did my great-great grandfather see the warning signs of WWI? Or was it just about work/opportunity like so many others in that era?). But writing this all down means I might be able to sleep tonight instead of letting my mind stew about it and keep me awake.
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Is America's "religion" the military? (Not what you think!)
Before you jump to any conclusions (and yes, the title was designed to do that), this isn't a directly political post. It's a post about live music, and our society's perceived and actual value of it.
A little background info on those of you who may not know already: I grew up in a Lutheran church. We used hymnals. We clap on beat 1 and 3. Raising hands in the air is allowed, but will get you strange looks, and you'll probably be the only one. When I started studying music theory in college, I found the Bach chorales we studied to be comforting and familiar because a lot of those chorales are still used in traditional churches. My high school boyfriend grew up Nazarene and we would argue about what "old-fashioned hymn" meant. He defined it as tent-revival-1800's-early-1900's, and I would laugh at him. "Really? 'Old' to you means 100 years? Try FIVE hundred." In any case, as much as I appreciate a really rocking band with electric bass and drums, sometimes it's also really awesome to hear a much older piece done well, like an organ sonata, being performed in its original context.
But I am also a jazz musician, and a choir director, and probably a bit more open minded about contemporary music in church than your average classically-trained-singer.
As a music teacher, I really do understand why some churches shy away from "classical" style music. Young people don't listen to it (or it's assumed that they don't), or pastors understand in order for it to be done well, they have to hire someone who is trained. Some churches can only afford a piano player or organist, some are lucky enough to have a budget to hire actual music directors and choral section leaders. Some churches rely on volunteers only. My opinion on this is about the same as non-union symphonies, theaters that pay actors more than the pit musicians, and bar owners who pay the entire band a percentage of the cover (but expect them to bring their own fans and groupies).
Let me put it to you another way: Let's say your talent is working with tools. You're a very talented carpenter. Having me ask you to volunteer to do your job for free for the church (which took time, money, and training to hone that innate talent) is an insult. But maybe you see that your church needs something fixed, and you're willing to donate your time to help out once or twice because you know they don't have the money to pay you. That's different than the church approaching YOU and asking you to fix things week after week after week for no pay (or worse, expecting you to provide materials as well ALL YEAR LONG). But for some reason, churches have no problem (or shame) in asking musicians to do this. "It's your gift" they say. "You should WANT to do it." Yeah, sure. I was talented before I went to college, too. But you want me to do it NOW because I have two degrees in it, and I can do it WELL. Those degrees and that training wasn't free, people. No one expects the pastor to work for free (although to be fair, many do it for very little money or work second jobs to support themselves which I also think is unjust).
So now, with all that said, let me get back to my original point....
Historically, if music was your profession, you were somebody's employee (if you wanted to eat, anyhow). You worked for a church, or were sponsored by royalty or the aristocracy. To a large extent, if you want to be a live performer, that is still largely true today (I know we don't have royalty, but in terms of symphony or full time church gigs, those are often supported by those people with the means to give LOTS of money away, our modern aristocracy....) However, most pros are freelancers, meaning they piecemeal different gigs together in the hopes that they will make enough to support themselves. The real danger in being a "freelancer" in this country is really the lack of financial stability and health care (especially health care). And as many Portland musicians know right now as Brian Tierney lays in the hospital of unprovoked gunshot wounds, those two things are inseparably related. If you want to be a professional live performer in this country and have conventional health insurance as we know it you have only a few options: 1) Do music part time and hold a non-related day job that provides health insurance. 2) Work as a church music director in a semi-large church that also requires you to sing or play an instrument. Not as a piano player in a small church or as a choral ringer. 3) Teach music in the schools. And let me tell you, these days there is no guarantee that there's any stability THERE, either. In 10 years of teaching, I have taught everything K through Community College except orchestra just to STAY EMPLOYED. 4) Have a full-time symphony job. Good luck with that, especially if you live in Louisville... 5) Be a musician in the military. And before you argue that I left out pop musicians, most of them are not professional live performers. Most of them make the bulk of their money in the recording studio and frankly, your chances of getting one of those gigs is like getting a symphony job, or being struck by lightning.
So #5 is the one I had an epiphany about today (while, not coincidentally, I was driving to my non-paid church gig...). If the bulk of musicians were historically employed and provided for (in many cases, housing and meals plus a stipend) by the church, what does it say that the only stable, living wage, music performer gig in this country is in our military? Are 3 and 4 star generals the only people who understand the value of live music? Because we have no state-mandated religion, as a society, we have no common ceremonies except those at sports events and military functions. And no one complains that there isn't enough "crowd participation" at these ceremonies, because they understand that being part of the spectator group and actively appreciating things done by other people is also an important job. But for some reason, in other parts of our lives, our expectations seem to be different. Either we don't want to pay for it, or if we do pay for it, we expect the kind of performance that can only be done with the aid of computers and digital sound software.
I'm still not sure where I'm going with all this, maybe I'll continue in another post---it all still feels very nebulous, but I know I'm onto something that's been bugging me for a while, which is my perception of music being devalued as a profession....help me out. Thoughts?
A little background info on those of you who may not know already: I grew up in a Lutheran church. We used hymnals. We clap on beat 1 and 3. Raising hands in the air is allowed, but will get you strange looks, and you'll probably be the only one. When I started studying music theory in college, I found the Bach chorales we studied to be comforting and familiar because a lot of those chorales are still used in traditional churches. My high school boyfriend grew up Nazarene and we would argue about what "old-fashioned hymn" meant. He defined it as tent-revival-1800's-early-1900's, and I would laugh at him. "Really? 'Old' to you means 100 years? Try FIVE hundred." In any case, as much as I appreciate a really rocking band with electric bass and drums, sometimes it's also really awesome to hear a much older piece done well, like an organ sonata, being performed in its original context.
But I am also a jazz musician, and a choir director, and probably a bit more open minded about contemporary music in church than your average classically-trained-singer.
As a music teacher, I really do understand why some churches shy away from "classical" style music. Young people don't listen to it (or it's assumed that they don't), or pastors understand in order for it to be done well, they have to hire someone who is trained. Some churches can only afford a piano player or organist, some are lucky enough to have a budget to hire actual music directors and choral section leaders. Some churches rely on volunteers only. My opinion on this is about the same as non-union symphonies, theaters that pay actors more than the pit musicians, and bar owners who pay the entire band a percentage of the cover (but expect them to bring their own fans and groupies).
Let me put it to you another way: Let's say your talent is working with tools. You're a very talented carpenter. Having me ask you to volunteer to do your job for free for the church (which took time, money, and training to hone that innate talent) is an insult. But maybe you see that your church needs something fixed, and you're willing to donate your time to help out once or twice because you know they don't have the money to pay you. That's different than the church approaching YOU and asking you to fix things week after week after week for no pay (or worse, expecting you to provide materials as well ALL YEAR LONG). But for some reason, churches have no problem (or shame) in asking musicians to do this. "It's your gift" they say. "You should WANT to do it." Yeah, sure. I was talented before I went to college, too. But you want me to do it NOW because I have two degrees in it, and I can do it WELL. Those degrees and that training wasn't free, people. No one expects the pastor to work for free (although to be fair, many do it for very little money or work second jobs to support themselves which I also think is unjust).
So now, with all that said, let me get back to my original point....
Historically, if music was your profession, you were somebody's employee (if you wanted to eat, anyhow). You worked for a church, or were sponsored by royalty or the aristocracy. To a large extent, if you want to be a live performer, that is still largely true today (I know we don't have royalty, but in terms of symphony or full time church gigs, those are often supported by those people with the means to give LOTS of money away, our modern aristocracy....) However, most pros are freelancers, meaning they piecemeal different gigs together in the hopes that they will make enough to support themselves. The real danger in being a "freelancer" in this country is really the lack of financial stability and health care (especially health care). And as many Portland musicians know right now as Brian Tierney lays in the hospital of unprovoked gunshot wounds, those two things are inseparably related. If you want to be a professional live performer in this country and have conventional health insurance as we know it you have only a few options: 1) Do music part time and hold a non-related day job that provides health insurance. 2) Work as a church music director in a semi-large church that also requires you to sing or play an instrument. Not as a piano player in a small church or as a choral ringer. 3) Teach music in the schools. And let me tell you, these days there is no guarantee that there's any stability THERE, either. In 10 years of teaching, I have taught everything K through Community College except orchestra just to STAY EMPLOYED. 4) Have a full-time symphony job. Good luck with that, especially if you live in Louisville... 5) Be a musician in the military. And before you argue that I left out pop musicians, most of them are not professional live performers. Most of them make the bulk of their money in the recording studio and frankly, your chances of getting one of those gigs is like getting a symphony job, or being struck by lightning.
So #5 is the one I had an epiphany about today (while, not coincidentally, I was driving to my non-paid church gig...). If the bulk of musicians were historically employed and provided for (in many cases, housing and meals plus a stipend) by the church, what does it say that the only stable, living wage, music performer gig in this country is in our military? Are 3 and 4 star generals the only people who understand the value of live music? Because we have no state-mandated religion, as a society, we have no common ceremonies except those at sports events and military functions. And no one complains that there isn't enough "crowd participation" at these ceremonies, because they understand that being part of the spectator group and actively appreciating things done by other people is also an important job. But for some reason, in other parts of our lives, our expectations seem to be different. Either we don't want to pay for it, or if we do pay for it, we expect the kind of performance that can only be done with the aid of computers and digital sound software.
I'm still not sure where I'm going with all this, maybe I'll continue in another post---it all still feels very nebulous, but I know I'm onto something that's been bugging me for a while, which is my perception of music being devalued as a profession....help me out. Thoughts?
Friday, March 30, 2012
It IS a small world after all....
So this moring, I open up Facebook and am bombarded with status updates and posts about a shooting that happened about a mile from my home. What struck me was that the updates came from high school friends and also from music professionals I have only met recently. The victim of the shooting, Brian Tierney, someone I went to high school with, was not someone I knew. Based on the posts, though, I gather that he is an immensely talented musician, and was living a pretty normal life with his wife and child. Not into drugs or anything else that would make him an obvious target for violent crime.
My heart goes out to his family, whose stress and suffering I can't even imagine right now. Even the idea of my husband being shot and critically injured so close to home....there are no words. (And at one point when we were really desperate for jobs, one of the options was 'cell phone disruptor' for the active Army...you know, the guys who keep IEDs from being detonated? Yeah, in Afghanistan....thank GOD that didn't work out).
But this really brought to the forefront of my mind how interconnected the music world really is. Especially in communities of specialized musicians. I feel really lucky and blessed to know as many people as I do who excel at this abstract performance art called music. Please pray for Brian and his family, and hug your own a little more tightly tonight.
My heart goes out to his family, whose stress and suffering I can't even imagine right now. Even the idea of my husband being shot and critically injured so close to home....there are no words. (And at one point when we were really desperate for jobs, one of the options was 'cell phone disruptor' for the active Army...you know, the guys who keep IEDs from being detonated? Yeah, in Afghanistan....thank GOD that didn't work out).
But this really brought to the forefront of my mind how interconnected the music world really is. Especially in communities of specialized musicians. I feel really lucky and blessed to know as many people as I do who excel at this abstract performance art called music. Please pray for Brian and his family, and hug your own a little more tightly tonight.
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Sailing
So when I was a kid, we didn't have a lot of money. The railroad would occasionally have layoffs, and my dad always seemed to be at the bottom of the totem pole. He worked for a variety of places during those times doing things like driving tow truck and doing regular car mechanic work to keep us in our home. Mom, the budget queen, made sure that no matter how much money came in, we were always clothed and fed. But because of that, we never went on any fancy vacations. Just trips to visit relatives, which was always good enough for me (what can I say? I have a fun family). I can't count the number of times I went to the beach or up to Grandma and Grandpa Chiapuzio's place up the mountain, but I remember my first airplane trip was with my school choir to New York when I was 17. The first time I'd been east of the Cascade mountain range, let alone the Rockies.
But something they did splurge on was a sailboat. Before I was born, they bought a 24 foot racing yacht and had it moored in Newport, Oregon (that's at the ocean, for all you Midwest people). A couple of my dad's younger brothers came out and sailed with them in Newport sometimes, and also when they kept it at Fern Ridge reservoir near Eugene. When I was born, they still had it at Fern Ridge. I don't remember much about that lake except that the caretakers of the park had a daughter close to my age and they had a hammock that we played in. My mom says when I was Sam's age or so (3) I was reading the letters and numbers on the boats in each slip (the registration numbers), and wasn't looking where I was going. Walked right off the end of the dock. She pulled me out immediately (and I was of course, wearing a life vest) but I wonder sometimes if that's part of the reason I dislike ever having my head underwater.
Sam did the same thing the other day....looking at something and not watching where he was going....walked right into a telephone pole. Well at least I know he's my kid, right? *sigh*
Anyway, just before my brother was born (I think?) Dad moved the boat from Fern Ridge to Dexter Lake up off of Highway 58, east of Eugene. At this point, Dad actually let me start helping with stuff on the boat, although I was still really too young to help with much other than tie up lines and steer. I spent a lot of time in the cabin instead. Part of this was because the heeling of the boat freaked me out. A LOT. The other reason was because if I was out on the deck, I had to wear my lifejacket, which I hated. Some kids camp with their families. We camped out on the boat. Another thing that freaked me out, because my "bunk" was near stowage spaces (yes that's spelled correctly) that were dark and musty so they must have monsters or spiders or I don't know.....I got over it when Lucas was little mostly because I didn't want HIM to have to sleep in the "scary" spot. Too bad I didn't know at that point he wouldn't have cared. =P
Unfortunately, when we moved to Portland, Dad had to sell the boat. One, river sailing can be a bit trickier than lake sailing (especially in the Columbia, lots of sandbars to get your keel hung up on), and the other, bigger, reason was because the cost of moorage in Portland was almost 3 times what they were paying in Eugene. My college friends all know about my "study hammock" that I carried around with me on nice days to hang from a tree and read in. That was one of the storage hammocks from that boat. The rocking motion was comforting to me (and still is. I love me a comfy hammock).
So you wanna know why I'm writing all this down?
"Baker Street" by Gerry Rafferty came on the radio this evening. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2j7uAimpx3k
When that song comes on, I can hear it in my mind as it sounded coming from the little transistor radio we had on the boat (tuned to the pop music station...), and I can smell the foam and nylon of my lifejacket, the mustiness of the cushions and my coloring books, Mom's pancakes (waffles at home, pancakes on the boat), and see the look of the marina lights on the water at night. I miss it more than I thought I did.
But something they did splurge on was a sailboat. Before I was born, they bought a 24 foot racing yacht and had it moored in Newport, Oregon (that's at the ocean, for all you Midwest people). A couple of my dad's younger brothers came out and sailed with them in Newport sometimes, and also when they kept it at Fern Ridge reservoir near Eugene. When I was born, they still had it at Fern Ridge. I don't remember much about that lake except that the caretakers of the park had a daughter close to my age and they had a hammock that we played in. My mom says when I was Sam's age or so (3) I was reading the letters and numbers on the boats in each slip (the registration numbers), and wasn't looking where I was going. Walked right off the end of the dock. She pulled me out immediately (and I was of course, wearing a life vest) but I wonder sometimes if that's part of the reason I dislike ever having my head underwater.
Sam did the same thing the other day....looking at something and not watching where he was going....walked right into a telephone pole. Well at least I know he's my kid, right? *sigh*
Anyway, just before my brother was born (I think?) Dad moved the boat from Fern Ridge to Dexter Lake up off of Highway 58, east of Eugene. At this point, Dad actually let me start helping with stuff on the boat, although I was still really too young to help with much other than tie up lines and steer. I spent a lot of time in the cabin instead. Part of this was because the heeling of the boat freaked me out. A LOT. The other reason was because if I was out on the deck, I had to wear my lifejacket, which I hated. Some kids camp with their families. We camped out on the boat. Another thing that freaked me out, because my "bunk" was near stowage spaces (yes that's spelled correctly) that were dark and musty so they must have monsters or spiders or I don't know.....I got over it when Lucas was little mostly because I didn't want HIM to have to sleep in the "scary" spot. Too bad I didn't know at that point he wouldn't have cared. =P
Unfortunately, when we moved to Portland, Dad had to sell the boat. One, river sailing can be a bit trickier than lake sailing (especially in the Columbia, lots of sandbars to get your keel hung up on), and the other, bigger, reason was because the cost of moorage in Portland was almost 3 times what they were paying in Eugene. My college friends all know about my "study hammock" that I carried around with me on nice days to hang from a tree and read in. That was one of the storage hammocks from that boat. The rocking motion was comforting to me (and still is. I love me a comfy hammock).
So you wanna know why I'm writing all this down?
"Baker Street" by Gerry Rafferty came on the radio this evening. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2j7uAimpx3k
When that song comes on, I can hear it in my mind as it sounded coming from the little transistor radio we had on the boat (tuned to the pop music station...), and I can smell the foam and nylon of my lifejacket, the mustiness of the cushions and my coloring books, Mom's pancakes (waffles at home, pancakes on the boat), and see the look of the marina lights on the water at night. I miss it more than I thought I did.
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Milestones
It started to be sort of a joke between me and Tyson....the fact that he's missed a lot of Sam's major milestones so far because they always happen when he's away on Army training.
It started when he first joined. The summer he went to AIT (6 weeks of Army job training for all you civilian-types) was when I was scheduled for my 20-week ultrasound. I couldn't wait for him to get back because I had to go to Chicago for my final term of grad school. And since there were no health issues, that was the only ultrasound I had. Tyson got to see still pictures on his phone (thank God for THAT technology at least).
Then, when Sam was 9 months old, Tyson was on AT (the 2 week training all reservists and Guard do each year). Sam had been trying to crawl for WEEKS, kinda rocking back and forth on his hands and knees....and after Tyson left, Sam decided to crawl for the first time. Again, thankful for the video feature on my phone so he didn't miss out completely.
I can't remember about walking. Or first words. I think he was home for those. Last summer while Tyson was gone on AT, Sam started using the toilet to pee, and figured out how to climb our 4 foot chain link fence.
But now it's become kind of a joke between us....every time he leaves for more than just overnight, we both wonder which milestone will occur. He went to Arkansas in January for two weeks but nothing happened on that one.
But this trip to Yakima, he's been gone for 30 days almost totally consecutive with no breaks. In that 30 days, Sam has
* learned how to pick out his own clothes and dress himself. Everything except socks and shoes. And shoes he can do if I put his socks on and the shoes don't have laces.
* figured out his body signals enough to poop in the toilet on a regular basis. In the past week, he's only had 2 accidents...a MAJOR improvement from accidents every day, sometimes twice a day.
* become interested in, and started putting together jigsaw puzzles (that one was completely out of the blue)
I'm having my ultrasound for kiddo #2 this week after Tyson gets home so he could come with me. Here's hoping that's a better start this time around!
It started when he first joined. The summer he went to AIT (6 weeks of Army job training for all you civilian-types) was when I was scheduled for my 20-week ultrasound. I couldn't wait for him to get back because I had to go to Chicago for my final term of grad school. And since there were no health issues, that was the only ultrasound I had. Tyson got to see still pictures on his phone (thank God for THAT technology at least).
Then, when Sam was 9 months old, Tyson was on AT (the 2 week training all reservists and Guard do each year). Sam had been trying to crawl for WEEKS, kinda rocking back and forth on his hands and knees....and after Tyson left, Sam decided to crawl for the first time. Again, thankful for the video feature on my phone so he didn't miss out completely.
I can't remember about walking. Or first words. I think he was home for those. Last summer while Tyson was gone on AT, Sam started using the toilet to pee, and figured out how to climb our 4 foot chain link fence.
But now it's become kind of a joke between us....every time he leaves for more than just overnight, we both wonder which milestone will occur. He went to Arkansas in January for two weeks but nothing happened on that one.But this trip to Yakima, he's been gone for 30 days almost totally consecutive with no breaks. In that 30 days, Sam has
* learned how to pick out his own clothes and dress himself. Everything except socks and shoes. And shoes he can do if I put his socks on and the shoes don't have laces.
* figured out his body signals enough to poop in the toilet on a regular basis. In the past week, he's only had 2 accidents...a MAJOR improvement from accidents every day, sometimes twice a day.
* become interested in, and started putting together jigsaw puzzles (that one was completely out of the blue)
I'm having my ultrasound for kiddo #2 this week after Tyson gets home so he could come with me. Here's hoping that's a better start this time around!
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